I’m still plugging along with my memory verses. Here’s what I’m working on for the next two weeks:
Psalm 34:1-3 (NLT)
I will praise the Lord at all times. I will constantly speak His praises. I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are discouraged take heart. Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt His name together.
Last weekend (April 1 & 2) I was able to attend Living Proof Live and hear Beth Moore speak. What a great experience! I was definitely praying for and anticipating hearing a word from God. Well, He didn’t disappoint! I felt like the whole weekend was God speaking straight to my heart. As soon as Beth announced the theme for the weekend, I knew I was right where God wanted me to be. The main topic was on waiting and what to do while you’re in a season of waiting. Hello! I’m telling you, right at me. I’ve had a few days now to think about and process some of what I heard.
Here are some highlights from my notes:
The main passage that Beth taught from was James 5:7-11.
Eight while we Wait
Embrace the word you love to hate – patience (& perseverance)
God has not moved on without me. It’s a long obedience in the same direction. Do the next thing. God is into process.
It may be bearing up with people or bearing up with circumstances. If we’ve asked for deliverance and we are still in it, there’s something that this season is meant to sow.
See the sacred in the simple while you wait
“The whole earth is full of His glory” Isaiah 6:3
Go look for your heart where it got lost.
Deuteronomy 11:13-14; Hosea 6:3. Waiting is not my punishment. Get my heart back in it and find my center in God.
Watch for relationships a long wait can cost.
Deliberately and graciously turn to God while you wait or we will turn on each other.
With delay we can become mockers, scoffers and cynical.
James 5:9 ~ “grumble” is unexpressed feelings of bitterness, groaning or sighing, not an honest complaint. God hears our groaning and we can take it to Him rather than taking it out on someone else.
Pray, believing that your rain is near.
I Kings 18:41-46. It’s easy to give up on prayer when you are not seeing answers, or the answer is a long time in coming. Continue to pray with earnestness, don’t give up, and persevere! Find Scripture to pray over your situation if you don’t have the words.
Study the lives of those who persevered.
Although Beth didn’t reference it, this made me think of Hebrews 11.
Trust that God will cause your eyes to see.
James 5:11 compared to Job 42:1-5 “heard….and have seen what the Lord finally brought about”
All that He’s been, your God will always be.
That’s it in a nutshell. I’m still meditating on these things and trusting God to continue to speak to me. It was so helpful for me and just what I needed to hear during this time of waiting.
Our God is faithful! He’ll never leave us or forsake us. He sees what we are going through. He cares about us and loves us more than we can ever imagine. As we wait on Him, our strength will rise and we will soar on wings like eagles (Isaiah 40:31)
Waiting…there is a lot of advice out there as to what you should do while you’re waiting to be matched with a birthmom, and it’s really good advice. For example: prepare the baby’s room, or start to purchase baby items; talk/meet with other adoptive families, or join an adoption support group; read books to prepare for parenting and adoption; spend time together as a couple before the baby comes (since you won’t have much time after); journal or blog your thoughts and emotions; and the list goes on (click here for a good set of resources to help with the wait).
In some form or another I’ve done most of these things during our wait time, but honestly, sometimes none of that cuts it and it’s just hard. It’s hard to be patient and wait for something that is so unknown and out of your control. The last couple weeks have been a real struggle for me and I’ve been feeling really discouraged with the long wait. I had a small bit of excitement when I purchased a baby stroller that I really wanted for a great deal from Craigslist, but that didn’t last too long. I really want to wait “well” and not spend all my time and energy complaining and focusing on what I don’t have. I want to “do everything without complaining or arguing,” including this wait. Beth Moore was talking about waiting during a video session of her Bible Study on Esther. She said that when we wait on the event, our strength will be depleted, but when we wait on the Lord, our strength is renewed (Isaiah 40:31, NKJV). I think it’s a lot about letting go of the circumstances and trusting God. He’s in control, and He’s good. I have to make the choice to believe it.
I’ve memorized Scripture in the past and stopped doing it after some time. I recognize the value in it as it focuses my mind on God and His truth and was encouraged to start it up again when I saw this post on Beth Moore’s blog. So, I’ve joined the 2011 Siesta Scripture Memory Team. We memorize 2 verses a month, with a new verse on the 1st and 15th of each month. We choose verses that are relevant and personal to us. We’re now on our 3rd verse this year. Here are the first two (from memory).
Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you. He will neither fail you, nor abandon you. Deuteronomy 31:8, NLT
Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation. My fortress where I will not be shaken. Psalm 62:5-6, NLT
And my new set of verses for the next two weeks:
My victory and honor come from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me. O my people, trust in Him at all times. Pour out your heart to Him, for God is our refuge. Psalm 62:7-8, NLT
A discussion we had last night at the support group that I attend, caused me to remember and think about the many ways that God has blessed us through this journey we’ve been on. All along the way, with each miscarriage we’ve been through, He has provided for us in so many ways. We’ve moved twice in that time frame and God has always brought wonderful friends into our lives, which have been there for us, praying for us and supporting us through the tough times. Even though they may not realize it, the small ways that they cared are what meant the most. A simple phone call, listening ear, or “I’m praying for you” let me know that they care.
At times, I have felt lonely, but I realize those are usually the times when I have separated myself from people and not really shared what was on my heart. The thing is, I want people to know what I need without me telling them, but that’s not the way it works. They can’t read my mind. I have to share the hurts and difficulties so that people have an opportunity to support me and care for me. If I look fine on the outside, and say that I’m fine when people ask, but really I’m not, I’m not being authentic and can’t expect that people would know any differently. I don’t think it’s wise to try this approach with just anyone, but know the people in your life who truly care about you and have supported you in the past (people you trust) and share with them when you are hurting. Tell them what you need from them. Remember that they can’t read your mind.
How can you support someone who is hurting? It’s not easy to know what to say or do. Ask them! How can I help you? What do you need? How can I be praying for you? Be available to them. Listen. Let them know that you are thinking of them. Acknowledge their hurt, don’t ignore it.
I love this verse:
Galatians 6:2 ~ Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
I need God’s peace to guard my heart and my mind. Through the uncertainties of this journey, the “what ifs,” the waiting, the discouragement and the disappointment, I need the peace that comes only from God. I have to trust God and allow Him into my life for that peace to come. It’s not an elusive peace; it’s available to me anytime I come to Him. I don’t have to live with anxiety, fears, and uncertainties. All I have to do is cry out to God and He will rescue me. He will deliver me from all fear. On the days when the big D’s attack – depression, discouragement, doubt, and despair; God is there. He is waiting for me to come to Him and lay my burdens down. In exchange for burdens, I am given His gift of rest & peace.
Philippians 4:6-7 (NLT)
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
In my quiet time I have been reading through “The One Year Book of Hope” by Nancy Guthrie. This week has been focused on the names of God and how His character is revealed through these names.
The passage for meditation this week is:
The LORD is a shelter for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble. Those who know your name trust in you, for you, O LORD, have never abandoned anyone who searches for you.
When I was in the midst of the pain of having gone through several miscarriages and was questioning God, I went “back to the basics” of who God is. He reveals Himself to us throughout all of Scripture and I had to make a choice whether I was going to believe Him or not. Was I going to trust Him? I can say that through all the times of struggle, as I have come to God with my doubts, fears, worries, pain, anger, heartache, questions, and so much more, that He has never, ever abandoned me. He is who He says He is!